Hope????
I have often wondered how I can be hopeful about my life and my health again.
When I was diagnosed with Diabetes in 1995 at 35 yrs of age, I saw it as a death sentence. I thought I was going to die in hospital. It was very scary being in hospital, and seeing myself getting sicker and sicker.
I have watched my Uncle die a horrendous death, as organ by organ shut down. My brother also has diabetes, and has trouble with his circulation, and eyesight.
I never heard of anyone getting type 1 in their 30's, so I thought I was safe once I was out of my 20's. What a shock!!
I knew all the symptoms, but was desperately hoping I was wrong.
My husband and I went out on Valentine's Day, and I couldn't see, had drinks in both hands and was peeing constantly. The next day my breath was off, but I still went to work. I had also lost a lot of weight in a short period of time.
A friend of mine was a nurse and she tested my blood. It tested "HIGH". Believe it or not, I got in my car and drove 45 minutes to see my GP.
He told me that I had to go to the hospital, and told me to go home first. He would get in touch with my husband, and fill out the paperwork.
Believe it or not, my GP wanted me to wait until the next day to go to the hospital because he didn't have time to write a letter.
By this time, I had passed out and my husband tells me he argued vehemently with my GP.
The next thing I knew I was in the hospital elevator with a nurse. All I remember is her SMILE.
I was there a month, while many things were tried. I am told that insulin was tried but that the dose was changed by 30 units at a time. And they wonder why I wasn't stable.
They decided I was type 2 due to my age. I was sent home on lots of pills. If I did anything other than sit in a chair, I had a hypo. GUARANTEED!!
Believe it or not, I went home sicker than I went into the hospital.
A year later, I was still unwell. I changed GP's, and insulin was tried. Within 8 hours I felt like my old self.
The QLD Health system caused my husband and myself a lot of pain. Particularly, in regional areas they seem inept at treating anything that is not exactly out of the textbook.
I have 2 chronic medical conditions, but I find the Diabetes by far the most difficult to manage.
I would have thought in this day and age, most health professionals would have a wealth of knowledge about diabetes.
There has been NO help with the emotional side of things, and the help I have received with the medical side of things has been damaging at the best of times.
Unfortunately, my experience has not been about professionals having any appropriate skills or knowledge about diabetes.
Recently, I had to have knee surgery and had some bleeding complications. As a result, I was sick, and stopped eating. It is the policy at this hospital not to give insulin to diabetics who are not eating. I tried to give myself insulin, and got in trouble with one of the nurses. As a result, my insulin was locked up.
As a result of no insulin, my blood sugar rose to 40, and I had to be transferred to Intensive Care. This happened in 2002. Can you believe it?
I have found an absoulutely fantastic GP who has saved my life many times. She was exceptional when I had knee surgery. Once she found out about it, she stepped in and took care of me. She truly is my angel. I would be lost without her. She is one in a million.
Until I found her, my husband and I had to cope on our own.
It is difficult to obtain current accurate information. The support groups here are for oldies with type 2 or kids with type 1.
The Diabetic Educators leave much to be desired. They seem to believe in the punitative approach with lots of yelling. I don't bother.
I have gotten information from your fantastic web site, books and magazines and my brother. and of course my FANTASTIC GP - Dr. Lea Kleinschmidt of Imbina Medical Centre in Rockhampton QLD.
So back to the question of hope,
For the lst time in 8 years, I am finding a bit of hope. I finally have a very good idea what to do, how to look after myself.
I am no longer trying to be perfect, but rather try to best I can at that moment in time.
I am no longer embarrassed, but I still hate how my freedom has been taken. I hate having to eat when I am not hungry, how tough it is to lose weight, how my period affects my control, stopping for food, insulin, checking blood.
I am trying to change my thinking about having diabetes. Maybe, then my hope will be restored???